Neji's Problem
by alchemistj
Summary: Hyuuga Neji, a proud member of the Hyuuga clan, is faced with problems which involve late night discoveries on the computer and several annoying ‘interruptions’. Will a certain blonde haired friend help him to relieve poor Neji with his difficulties?


**Neji's Problem**

_By Gaki_

_ Summary: Hyuuga Neji, a proud member of the Hyuuga clan, is faced with problems which involve late night discoveries on the computer and several annoying 'interruptions'. Will a certain blonde-haired friend help him to relieve poor Neji with his difficulties?_

Disclaimer: I don't own any kind of manga or anime plots, or even the characters. Even if I close my eyes and tap my heels three times and wish for it, it will never happen. Humph.

Warning: SLASH male/male, if you're against it, you can turn away, or read and review anyway. I strongly recommend the second option.

A very strange story. I was trying to sleep one night, but for some reason I just couldn't. So, I went and sat upon my desk, took out sheets of paper and decided to write something. I didn't know exactly what I was going to write, but I wrote something. And now it's turned into this. I don't even remember what I was thinking...

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**_ Part 1: Of Beasts and Blonde Locks_**

Hyuuga Neji, branch family member of the noble Hyuuga clan, had a problem. That's right, problem. For Hyuuga Neji. Which had nothing to do with the unfairness of the system of head and branch families, nor the trivialities of fate. So, it might've been _that_ kind of problem, when a brave shinobi of Konoha is faced with a dangerous enemy on a noble and risky mission, but if it was, Neji would've been extremely grateful. No, it wasn't that kind of problem. It was more of a…frustration kind of problem.

Ok, maybe you're not getting a clear idea. Let's just start from the top.

It is well known throughout the hidden village of Konoha and their shinobis especially, that Hyuuga Neji is not exactly the typical romantic guy, nor even the typical romantic type, _nor _even the type to express emotion which would put them under the risk of exposing 'vulnerable weaknesses.' Of course, most of the beautiful males in Konoha followed this particular pattern, adding much to the fan girls' (and boys') difficulties and heartbreaks. Uchiha Sasuke is just one example. But, many are under the illusion that just because they have a stone-hard exterior, they do not feel…temptations. Of course, if one was to tell another of this conspiracy, they would most likely get laughed, scoffed or sneered at, or even get punched. Because, please, Hyuuga Neji and romance are the two topics that can never belong under the same category. No-one would believe that Hyuuga Neji would stay up for half the night on his computer, downloading the latest video stream of live guy-on-guy action from the infamous Konoha Kinks+. If one was to say _that_, they'd _definitely_ get punched, just for its extreme ridiculousness. No! Hyuuga Neji would definitely not download any type of sexual material from any dirty source...

...that's what everyone thought. Until they were proven wrong. Well, Naruto was the only one who saw the proof, anyway.

Naruto was lying on the highest point of the hill, on the soft, green grass. The weather was very nice, and lately, there wasn't much shinobi action going on. Peace enclosed the country in its mellow warmth. Hyuuga Neji was sitting beside him, a cup in his grip, silently sipping at the green tea within. He shifted his eyes to take a look at Naruto, without moving his head. He refused to get caught gazing at the blonde beauty lying so peacefully beside him. He watched his gentle rises of his chest, and the subtle movements of his eyelashes as it got caught in a steady breeze. His hair swayed dreamily as sunlight bounced of those messy golden locks as Neji watched, completely hypnotized. He even missed those intent, sharp blue eyes staring up at him curiously. Neji quickly recovered from his trance and finally noticed Naruto's stare. Neji's cheeks were suddenly tinted with pink.

"Neji?"

Luckily, Naruto hadn't noticed his blush, much to his relief. Naruto then sat up, and started examining Neji.

"What?" Neji replied, feeling slightly nervous under the other's scrutinizing gaze.

"Can I ask you something?"

Neji gulped inaudibly, suddenly feeling very heated as Naruto leant closer and closer towards him until his lips were positioned right beside his ear.

"What are you doing, Naruto?"

Naruto exhaled slowly, his breath tickling the skin of Neji's ear. He felt _very_ heated, indeed.

"Just answer the question, Neji-kun."

"Fine. What is it?" Neji replied, trying to hide the quiver in his voice.

"Do you…ever get horny?" whispered Naruto.

Neji's eyes bulged, mouth opening like an automatic garage door. He nearly doubled over with shock and embarrassment. Recovering almost immediately, he swiftly pushed, or rather shoved Naruto away to create some distance between them.

"What?"

Naruto frowned.

"Gee, Neji-kun. That hurt. I only asked you a small question. You said so yourself, that I was allowed to ask. Anyways, Neji-kun, do you?"

This time, it was Neji's turn to frown.

"Do I what, Naruto-kun?"

"Do you get horny? _Ever_?"

Neji turned his head away, pretending it was from annoyance.

"Naruto-kun, only you would ask such a question without an ounce of shame. Unfortunately, I will not tolerate such shameless idiocy, even from you."

Naruto cocked his head to his side in confusion. Them, it slowly turned into a realization as he put on a fox-like grin.

"Hehe. In _other_ words, you don't want to answer. I just wanted to ask because you're _always_ so uptight, Neji-_kun_," Naruto whined, "You should sleep around a bit and loosen yourself up."

He then exploded into a fit of insane snickering.

Again, Neji tried his best to keep a straight face.

"You know, I could give you a couple of videos, it has these _really_ pretty onee-chans with _really_ big ju-"

Before Naruto could finish off his sentence, Neji sharply stood up, turned on his feel and started to walk away, a tad too fast. Once Neji's back was against Naruto, red immediately began to spread like wildfire across his milky complexion.

Ever since that incident with the computer a year ago, he had been taken into a new world of bare asses, tight leather, screaming, and very sweaty, very_ male_ bodies.

Neji was 14; a year had passed since he lost against Uzumaki Naruto in the Chuunin exams. It had shocked him, to say the least. Shocked him that this idiot dropout had held so much power, enough to change the course of fate, something the Hyuuga boy never thought would happen. He had found him in the darkness and saved him. Naruto and his bright smile was his light.

It was strange. Whenever he had an idle moment to spare, the blonde-haired boy kept on creeping into his mind. At first, he just brushed the thought off with the simple explanation that he felt grateful for him. But as time passed by, Neji became more and more concerned for his own sanity. He had begun to have thoughts of Naruto that he shouldn't have for a fellow male ninja. In fact, any sort of male for that matter.

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Hyuuga Neji woke up with a thin layer of sweat covering his body, and sat up panting.

"What in the world…what's happening to me?"

He dreamed of Naruto. Naked Naruto, moaning Naruto, gasping Naruto, begging Naruto…

Neji looked down at his bed sheets and noticed a protruding shape amongst the fabric.

"Oh god…"

Neji just sat there and stared at the strange reaction, waiting for it to go away.

"Why…doesn't it…go…away…?"

Neji growled and squirmed, only to create friction between the sheets against his already sensitized genitalia. He gasped, and groaned in frustration. He gripped tightly at his sheets, a bead of sweat slowly rolling down his forehead.

"Think…think…"

Neji dared not touch 'it' and provoke 'it' further, scared that if he did, it would prove that a link existed between Naruto and this insane and private pleasure. Instead, he thought of Rock Lee.

"Tight green jumpsuit, fuzzy eyebrows, abnormally round and stony eyes, bowl cut hair, strange relationship with Gai sensei…"

Neji seemed to gain some control over this small(which was not small at all) beast in front of him, and sighed with relief. He lay back on his bed as he slowly began to feel drowsy, and fell into a peaceful slumber.

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After the first dirty thoughts of Naruto, they never seemed to stop. It was like he had pushed the first domino which would cause millions of others to collapse. Nearly every night, he woke up panting, as it became increasingly harder to forget about his heated beast.

Eventually, not even thoughts of Rock Lee and Gai sensei together, dancing naked on the roof of Hokage Tower could keep his beast down. Finally, Neji succumbed to the persistent throbbing of his member. Or at least tried to.

He hesitated at first. In fact, sat there nearly all night deciding whether to touch it or continue to try and ignore it. But he knew that this would not be possible. It ached, it literally ached. 'It' had not been relieved since…he couldn't even remember when. Every time he had a chance, it was all because of Naruto. But, he had reached his limit. He could no longer fight it.

---------

With trembling fingers, he peeled away the soaked sheets to expose his boxer-clad lower half. His beast seemed to howl with anticipation for the events that were soon to come. Neji audibly gulped.

With his outstretched index finger, he gently placed it on the tip. An electric current seemed to shoot throughout his body from where his finger had just touched. Neji groaned with ecstasy as his breath became shallow. Yet, his beast was far from being satisfied.

He flexed his other fingers and closed around his member, sending another set of waves to all his nerve cells. He began to gently stroke the side of it, taming the beast from its unruly, merciless ways, and the beast, in return, quivered with pleasure.

"Uh…oh…"

Neji tilted his head back slightly, and tried to maintain his normal breathing pace. Soon, he felt like he needed more, and quickly pushed down his boxers. The beat was released from its lair.

Neji breathed deeply with anticipation.

Images of Naruto flashed in his mind, where he would be sprawled on his dark, grey sheets, pinned possessively under him, moaning and writhing with pleasure, golden locks splayed messily all over his pillow. Neji's beast strained a small amount of clear, pearly liquid from its tip, and Neji looked on nervously.

"Nn…Naruto…"

Neji lifted his hands again and ever-so-slowly reached for his strained member. Minutes seemed to pass and nothing knew _when_ those pale, slender fingers would reach its destination.

His middle finger seemed only half an inch away from touching the heat when the door slammed open. A shocked Hyuuga reflexively reached for his kunai from under his pillow and threw it towards the intruder. The door quickly swung shut to block the sharp object as Neji hastily yanked up his boxers and sat up, cross-legged, attempting to hide his beast, which was already shrinking away in embarrassment.

There was a shy knock on the door as a quiet voice spoke up from behind it.

"A-ano…Neji-niisan…is something wrong?"

Neji visibly relaxed as he realized that Hinata hadn't seen anything.

"Nothing is wrong, Hinata-sama. You should knock next time, or else I would think you are an intruder. What did you come for, Hinata-sama?"

There was a brief moment of silence from behind the door.

"G-gomen, Neji-niisan. It's just that, we need to be at the Hokage tower for the shinobi meeting today. I thought you were still sleeping…"

Neji glanced up at the clock on the wall. It read six-thirty. Had he really been up this long?

"I see."

After an awkward moment, Neji could hear Hinata's footsteps getting further and further away. Neji stood up and started to get dressed.

---------

So he _ had_ at least _tried_ to solve his problem once, but his embarrassment had prevented any further attempts at relieving his frustration. Until that night, when he accidentally stumbled across something strange.

---------

Neji just got home from training with his team and Gai-sensei.

He was rather sick of Gai-sensei's strange obsession with Rock Lee, and his irritating proposals to challenge him in the 'ultimate battle,' to determine the better of them two, while Ten-Ten looked on adoringly at Lee. Never in a million centuries would Neji understand her and her twisted tastes. So, after turning down many challenges and listening to several rants about the 'springtime of youth,' he was physically and mentally exhausted, and just wanted some kind of way to 'wind down.'

Neji walked towards his silver computer and pushed the button to turn it on. After a couple of 'beeps' and 'clinks,' Neji began clicking onto several web browsers.

"Weather: Sunny with clouds. Correct. Hokage-sama gets drunk and starts brawl in Konoha streets. Happens every time. Hot sales of latest 'Icha Icha Paradise' series…not interested."

After Neji had browsed through all the essential information, his pale eyes caught something just before he was going to close the browser.

"Top underground Konoha secret. Discoveries of infamous hidden establishment in the depths of Konoha? What is this?"

Neji clicked on the link, curious as to what this hidden establishment was. Instantly, he was brought to a new site, no longer in 'Konoha Happenings."

"Not a KH article?"

Neji waited for the page to load. It was strange because it took a fair bit of time to load. He glanced at the address bar, which read 'www dot kk dot knha dot com.'

"KK?" Neji muttered.

Before he could come up with possible words that would match this acronym, some kind of video had loaded and was playing. A strange, exotic type of music reverberated from the speakers, which was followed by human sounds of sighing and moaning.

"What…"

Neji's eyes widened.

"Konoha Kinks. The Ultimate pleasure lounge finally exposed to the public. Come and play now…" a woman's voice said from the speakers. Images of naked women and men flashed upon the screen. By the passing second, those images started to get more explicit.

"Konoha Kinks is the ultimate club for prestige fun, holding a range of secret beauties, only for prestige players to touch. We have beauties to suit all heterosexuals, lesbians and homosexuals, all waiting to be played with."

Neji then saw a short segment of two slim young men, one with brown hair and the other with blonde, entwined and sweaty, sliding up and down each other with enthusiastic fervor. Neji felt like he had been struck with a hammer, and felt strange and euphorically dizzy. He staggered back and fell in a heap on the floor.

"So come on, come on over and play, we're all waiting…"

The music faded away and the browser changed to the homepage of Konoha Kinks. Neji's mouth was dry, and all exhaustion had vanished. He Glanced down, and was once again faced with his 'problem.'

"Again…"

Neji decided he couldn't resist it much longer.

A part of his innocence was taken away, and the rest was tumbling down at a rapid rate. He would never get that image of those two naked male bodies out of his mind; he knew he had to give in sometime.

Making sure the door was locked and checking with his Byakugan if anyone was nearby, he slowly made way to the chair and sat in front of the computer. He read the links. 'Naughty Sally.' 'Cream and Jean.' 'Brunette Paradise.' 'Golden Innocence.'

The last link caught his attention. He hastily clicked onto it.

A file began to load, as he idly wondered if this was legal.

The video began, and the first thing Neji saw was a blonde boy with bright blue eyes in an orange yukata. He was walking through a large crowd in some kind of festival. Suddenly, the blonde was violently pushed and knocked over by a passer-byer. He was on the ground with his yukata pushed off his creamy shoulders, as he dramatically looked up with tears in his eyes. Then, a hand appeared in front of his face.

"Need some help?"

The blonde boy looked up, and his eyes came into contact with the brunette above him.

Soon, images of both men sprawled on a futon played, doing unspeakable things to each other.

Neji gripped the edge of his desk, his knuckles turning white. He shifted and fidgeted in his seat, feeling extremely uncomfortable.

"Uhhh…Ohhh…don't…stop…HIRO SAMA!"

The brunette's hips were thrusting back and forth, his long hair tickling the blonde's chest. The blonde's head was thrown back against the pillow, wild pants escaping his pink, swollen lips.

Neji didn't even blink at the erotic scene in front of him. His hand slipped under his boxers and started stroking the hard warmth with desperation. They got faster and faster as each pump was synchronized with the thrusts of the heated couple. Sweat was dripping down the side of his pale face. All his frustration had piled into this one session, and he thought that this was his chance to relieve himself, _finally_.

"HIRO-SAMA!" The blonde's face contorted with pleasure as a pearly substance spurted out from the tip of his member, onto his stomach. And Neji as so close, just a couple more strokes and he would get rid of his problem.

"N…Na…Naruto-kun…" Neji grunted.

"NEJI-KUN!"

Neji's hand froze. He began to panic with embarrassment. He heard banging from his window. Neji turned off the computer and zipped himself up in record time, and stalked over to his window. He swung the curtain back and saw a strange green figure with its body pressed against the glass.

"NEJI-KUN! LET ME IN! IT'S ME, ROCK LEE, KONOHA'S BEAUTIFUL GREEN BEAST, COME TO DELIVER AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM GAI-SENSEI!"

Neji clenched his teeth as his insides fumed with anger.

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So basically, up until now, he had never gotten rid of his problem. He only dared to only a couple of times. Hard to believe, but Neji seriously thought that some kind of sick fate was preventing him of having an orgasm properly. There were many interruptions, including many times by Lee, Gai-sensei, Hinata's father, the roof which decided to collapse, and once, he even slept while at it, when he tried to cram a session in after a B-rank mission.

Neji simply found it impossible to find release, and seeing Naruto almost everyday wasn't helping, either.

"Oi Neji! Wait for me!" Naruto called out.

Neji quickly gained enough composure to face Naruto again. Naruto caught up, panting by his side.

"Neji, what's with you, running off like that?" Naruto pouted, scrunching up his nose. Neji caught this expression and found it extremely cute.

"I did not run."

Naruto pouted even more.

"Well, you stalked off suddenly, when I was just offering you some of my-"

Neji halted. Naruto looked back and saw Neji looking at the sky. Naruto looked on with confusion evident on his face.

"Gee, Neji's sure acting funny today…" Naruto muttered under his breath.

"OI! Neji-kun!"

Neji looked at Naruto. The truth was, he couldn't handle Naruto being so close beside him, while he was talking about…videos. He had to concentrate on something simple and pure, like the sky. Suddenly, Naruto grabbed his arm, causing a feint blush on Neji's cheeks, as he began dragging him.

"C'mon, Neji, I know the perfect place to loosen you up. Don't worry, you'll feel _ really _good, it's a promise!" Naruto chirped.

Neji gulped.

"…and exactly _where_ is this 'perfect place'?" Neji inquired, enjoying the warmth of Naruto's grip on his arm.

Naruto's head turned slowly to Neji. His eyes were narrowed with ridiculous secrecy.

"Somewhere hot and steamy, that will make you sweat and moan."

Blood dripped down from Neji's nose.

"NEJI! You have a nosebleed!"

* * *

…and there's the beginning of Neji's Problems. I have no idea of how I will end this, it was all so sudden.

Konoha Kinks will be one of the central locations for my other fic, 'The Last Assessment,' which I will be posting some time later.

I was just desperately trying to get anything up on ff, and finally I'm done! I have absolutely no idea what people will think of this fic, but please, leave a review! And I absolutely don't mind flames, as long as they sound reasonable!

-Gaki


End file.
